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Do you get frustrated at having to repeat yourself over and over?
Wouldn’t life be so much easier if people just listened the first time?
Well, the likelihood is that people won’t hear what you say initially: their minds are elsewhere; they may misconstrue what you mean; they may totally mishear what you say.
The reality is that great leaders must repeat their message multiple times, without judgement of those they want to hear it.
Recently, on retreat, I was meditating at sunrise on a former lavender farm perched high on top of the Brokenback mountain range. This idyllic setting in southeastern Australia had sweeping views over the Hunter Valley vineyards and all the way to the Barrington Tops many miles in the distance.
Stretching down the valley on the left where I was sitting was the treeline of the Pokolbin State Forest, a mass of mature spotted gum and ironbark from which a wedge-tailed eagle emerged into the diffused morning light.
Stretching down the valley to my right was a mix of woodlands and heaths. Weaving between this vegetation was a well worn pathway. This was the only clue that the land was any different from when the Wonarua people lived undisturbed in the area over 3,000 years ago. I was on a working farm and this winding streak of well trodden, orange Mesozoic earth was the way cattle moved from their overnight shelter down into the grazing lands at the bottom of the valley.
The idyllic peace of the morning was pierced by one of the farmers, “Stay in line, stay in line!” Repeated like an oft-used mantra his words may simply have slipped into the back of my consciousness, yet another element in life’s rich tapestry as my meditative mind opened wide.
But I chose to reflect on what he was saying and to whom. He was urging his cattle to stay on the track as they descended into the valley. If they strayed there was a chance they would stumble and fall down the steep slope.
In that moment it struck me that we can learn a lot from this farmer: what stood out the most was how calmly he repeated his mantra; even though he would have to do so many hundred of times a day, both going down in the morning and coming back up in the evening, there was no anger in his voice; he wasn’t frustrated that the cows didn’t get it the first time he told them to keep in line; he was totally non-judgmental and his key concern was the well being of his cattle.
By no means am I equating the people you communicate with to cattle, but there is a simple analogy here. We may need to say things over and over for them to stick, and sometimes no matter how many times we repeat a message, even one designed for someone else’s well being, we realise that we must repeat it again, and again.
The next time you find yourself becoming aware that you are repeating yourself, withhold judgement; treat the words you are saying with reverence, transforming them into a mantra; and enjoy the warm basking glow that comes from being totally of service to others.
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